For the most part, visitors to my blog are limited to myself and my friends, more the former than the latter, but, on occasion, I'll see some outsiders venture into my small corner of internet ignominy, probably for the last time.
Thanks to some nifty tricks, I can easily discern the reason these poor misguided idiots found my website. On occasion, it will be somewhat legitimate, google searches for shock advertising or 9/11 and Batman, but the true gem of outside appeal lies not in my rhetorical acumen, but my one-time reference to Sonic the Hedgehog porn.
It's true. The main draw to my website is Sonic porn. I don't know why it's Sonic porn. I only talked about Sonic porn once. I think I only even said the word, "Sonic porn" one time, if that. But for some reason, fans of Sonic porn seem to feel that Sonic porn lies on my Sonic porn website, which is simply not Sonic porn true. There is no Sonic porn here, nor has there been Sonic porn, nor will there be Sonic porn, and, if by some wacky physical aberration, time gains a fourth direction, there will be no Sonic porn there either. Let me state this very clearly: the form and function of this website, has nothing to do with Sonic porn, except for the casual reference to Sonic porn, and even then it's a strictly business affair with the Sonic porn, as I will express no love for Sonic porn (although no outward expressions of hatred for Sonic porn either). It's not that I'm anti Sonic porn. I'm sure Sonic porn is lovely, for people who love Sonic porn, or porn of Sonic nature, but Sonic porn is just not my thing. I'll admit I've never tried Sonic porn, but one would have to convince me that Sonic porn is worth trying, before I venture into the realm of porn that can be considered Sonicesque. But perhaps I'm going on a Sonic porn tangent. The Sonic porn point that I was trying to make, Sonic porn minutes ago, was that Sonic porn is not on this site. End of Sonic porn story.
(Anyone familiar with SEO?)